Hi all, I’m looking for some outside perspective and advice regarding my current situation. This is going to be a bit long.
I’m 28 y/o, current take-home pay is ~RM4.5k. I have a net worth of RM246k (includes EPF, ASNB, StashAway, stocks, PRS, FD & money market funds) and no current loans.
Monthly savings is RM2.4k which includes savings for retirement, potential house, sinking fund, general savings and investment. Monthly expenses is around RM1.5k to 2k depending on the month (this includes giving RM700 to parents).
If I just had myself to take care of, I think I’ll be okay. The problem is that my parents are terrible with their finances and have a lot of debt and no savings. While they haven’t directly asked me to start funding their day-to-day expenses (and their retirement), I know it’s inevitable, seeing the current situation.
I’m still living with my parents and they still owe the bank almost RM200k for our current house. There are other debts on top of that, but I don’t know the full details, I just know it’s a lot.
On one hand I feel like I should know so that I can perhaps try to plan for the future (since the burden will very likely fall on me), but on the other hand I don’t dare to ask because I don’t want to open that floodgate. My philosophy so far has been “if they don’t ask me to contribute directly, I’ll pretend I don’t know” because I know whatever I earn will never be enough to cover their monthly repayments for their debts, in addition to daily living costs.
My mum is still working but earns less than me, while my dad has been out of work for a long time and is essentially retired. Both are in their early 60s and my mum is depleting her EPF very quickly and once that runs out and she stops working, they’ll be completely reliant on me.
My dilemma is this: I can’t change their debt or spending habits, and the best I can do is provide a monthly sum as “rent” since I’m living with them. I feel like I definitely should increase the amount since they’re struggling and personally I’m in an okay place financially (I think), but at the same time, they’re so bad with money that I’m afraid an increase will mean they will simply waste it - and tbh, it makes me angry to see the way they’re still so careless about spending when they’re drowning in debt. I suppose I can pay for some bills and debt directly, but I don’t want them to wrongly assume I can afford it easily.
So, I feel it’s better for me to hold on to whatever extra money I have and build my savings and investments so that I’m in a better position to support them when the time comes. Cutting them off completely is not an option, but I also don’t want to enable their bad decisions.
Any advice? Your perspective would be much appreciated - I’m too deep in this to see it objectively. Thank you for reading!
I’m 28 y/o, current take-home pay is ~RM4.5k. I have a net worth of RM246k (includes EPF, ASNB, StashAway, stocks, PRS, FD & money market funds) and no current loans.
Monthly savings is RM2.4k which includes savings for retirement, potential house, sinking fund, general savings and investment. Monthly expenses is around RM1.5k to 2k depending on the month (this includes giving RM700 to parents).
If I just had myself to take care of, I think I’ll be okay. The problem is that my parents are terrible with their finances and have a lot of debt and no savings. While they haven’t directly asked me to start funding their day-to-day expenses (and their retirement), I know it’s inevitable, seeing the current situation.
I’m still living with my parents and they still owe the bank almost RM200k for our current house. There are other debts on top of that, but I don’t know the full details, I just know it’s a lot.
On one hand I feel like I should know so that I can perhaps try to plan for the future (since the burden will very likely fall on me), but on the other hand I don’t dare to ask because I don’t want to open that floodgate. My philosophy so far has been “if they don’t ask me to contribute directly, I’ll pretend I don’t know” because I know whatever I earn will never be enough to cover their monthly repayments for their debts, in addition to daily living costs.
My mum is still working but earns less than me, while my dad has been out of work for a long time and is essentially retired. Both are in their early 60s and my mum is depleting her EPF very quickly and once that runs out and she stops working, they’ll be completely reliant on me.
My dilemma is this: I can’t change their debt or spending habits, and the best I can do is provide a monthly sum as “rent” since I’m living with them. I feel like I definitely should increase the amount since they’re struggling and personally I’m in an okay place financially (I think), but at the same time, they’re so bad with money that I’m afraid an increase will mean they will simply waste it - and tbh, it makes me angry to see the way they’re still so careless about spending when they’re drowning in debt. I suppose I can pay for some bills and debt directly, but I don’t want them to wrongly assume I can afford it easily.
So, I feel it’s better for me to hold on to whatever extra money I have and build my savings and investments so that I’m in a better position to support them when the time comes. Cutting them off completely is not an option, but I also don’t want to enable their bad decisions.
Any advice? Your perspective would be much appreciated - I’m too deep in this to see it objectively. Thank you for reading!