What is the minimum salary needed such that it’s economical for a parent to keep working and use childcare rather than stay home

[carlamariecainoy]

Keen to get the forums views on what point does childcare vs stay at home parenting become cost neutral,

In lamens terms, at what point are you no worse off or better off under the below scenarios

A - Parent stays home 5 days a week and looks after child. No salary. No childcare fees

B - Parent goes to work and pays childcare for 5 days a week. Earns a salary. Pays childcare fees

Assume dual income family under both scenarios

Obviously B makes sense if the difference is significant (everyone has their own view on what that is) but I don’t imagine most people would go with B if it meant an extra 1-2k per annum

• Also for some reason, I can’t change the post flair.

 

[janey84]

@carlamariecainoy When I did some calculations, my wife going back part time was more economical than 5 days. However that was back when they had a 10k cap on the subsidy, and 3 days a week of childcare didn't hit that cap. Now without the cap 5 days might work out alright numbers wise

However, think about things other than just the costs here, that is time in your child's life you will never get back. In my opinion, work out whatever you can to give yourselves the most time with your child. If you need to go back to work for financial reasons etc, then sure do it, but try minimise it IMO

Probably not a popular opinion in this sub, but my 2c.

 

[ayaba]

@janey84 I'd also suggest looking to see if you can both do part time. It's good for kids to have access to both parents and can be favorable from a tax perspective too!

 

[hopeless2016]

@ayaba Totally agree with this!

 

[shayda]

@ayaba This is what we do. Works really well.

 

[19ana89]

@ayaba We are going to do this. I'm the mum and I work in shutdowns in mining so can go away and work for 2 weeks at a time, then be present the rest of the year. My plan is to go away 3 times a year and just be home the rest of the time. They are normally 84-91 hr weeks so we get taxed through the roof but I should get most of it back. Will mean my partner can work part time if he wants to, and we can enjoy raising our daughter.

 

[resjudicata]

@ayaba Probably what we will eventually do

 

[resjudicata]

After attacking everyone on the sub for doing the same? Ok....

 

[bellaniyah]

@janey84 Purely from a child development POV a few days in childcare, especially once they get closer to school age, can be beneficial. It helps kids to develop better social and emotional skills and is generally a good learning opportunity. While it is right that your kids will only be kids once, I’d also think about early childhood education as a development opportunity.

 

[hurricane175]

@bellaniyah This is very age dependent. Big difference between a 6 month old in child care and a 2 year old development wise. You can introduce unnecessary attachment issues if you send them in too early.

Theres been some studies out of Netherlands and the Nordic countries that looked at a childs stress response over the first year of childcare. The younger the child the more stressed they were and longer it took to wind down at home. There’s also been some studies looking at a childs emotional response to a potentially threatening situation and found that kids who entered daycare earlier had less ability to regulate themselves in the situation. Its pretty tricky to study the effects and obviously lots of variability between child care workers and how many kids etc..

Sometimes sending a well regulated kid off to childcare can help them socialise, but I think general rule of thumb should always lean towards child rearing with a parent as long as possible for the childs benefit.

 

[steelebilly]

@hurricane175 Are you saying prioritise time with children over my career and mortgage. How dare you!!?? /s

 

[reviewmayhutmui]

@hurricane175 Purely anecdotal here and may have nothing whatsoever to do with childcare, but if putting kids in childcare produces adolescents and adults with better social skills, I wonder why does it seem that young people today are less social and less able to effectively communicate than generations previous (who didn't have childcare & stayed at home with - mostly - mum), and I'd argue more mental health issues (I.e. possibly lower mental resilience).

Maybe this is more a result of their parents being stressed out and anxious from having such frantically busy lives and working full time (as is necessary these days). Kids seem to pick up these traits from their parents, at least insofar as I have observed with my sisters and friends who have kids.

 

[hopeless2016]

@reviewmayhutmui What evidence do you have for those statements?

 

[reviewmayhutmui]

@hopeless2016 Read the first sentence

 

[hopeless2016]

@reviewmayhutmui I read the first sentence as you were being anecdotal about the link between reduced emotional resilience, poorer communication and social skills and child care.

I’m asking where your evidence is that those things are true. Looking at my parents generation I see no evidence of emotional resilience (also completely anecdotal).

 

[resjudicata]

@reviewmayhutmui It’s not they have done studies, Australia has some of the worst parental leave in a developed nation, people fire there kids in childcare and head back to work, they don’t do this other places. You can’t even find a place that’ll take a kid under 1 in Canada.

 

[stevo1k]

@resjudicata That’s just clearly incorrect. The worst parental leave ? You seen the US system ?

 

[resjudicata]

@stevo1k Don’t compare us to America they are in a league of their own, I’m talking Canada, UK, EU, Nordic bloc etc.

 

[johnritter]

@hurricane175 From what age? My kid went to childcare from 12 weeks old. She loved it.

Even an average childcare can give so many experiences that is more difficult at home. Outdoor play, socialising with kids and adults (strangers as well),sharing, not being dependent on mum and dad, getting up early and getting ready, all the activities like painting, blocks etc etc.

Then there is the arguable sharing of colds, chicken pox, and every other imaginable illness.

Also good for adults to have time away from their kid. Absence makes the heart grow fonder...

I do think there is a balance. 5 days full time for long hours is probably not the best thing. Still need plenty of time at home with mum and/or dad.

 

[hurricane175]

@johnritter Based on the theory of attachment if there is a stronger bond between child and caregiver, they will be better regulated to handle potentially threatening situations such as socialising with other kids and adults at a later time. A child that is raised in an environment that allows them to fully explore and experience their environment free of worry whether mum or dad will be around will thrive. The issue with early child care is that it introduces insecurity into their daily rhythm at a time when their hypothalamic pituitary adrenal axis is forming - the part of the brain responsible for emotional regulation. The less trauma or time apart during the first three years will almost surely be best for the child. Absence does not make the heart grow fonder when you don’t have the psychological capacity to understand your parents will return. They can’t regulate themselves yet.

Unfortunately this is a decision that most parents are faced with because we, as a culture, prioritise GDP and career advancement over child rearing. There should be far more incentive to raise children and to allow people to take time off work to do so.

Its at least a partial solution to the rising rates of anxiety, depression and other mental health sequelae from emotional dysregulation.