What am I doing wrong?

[imjapun]

@duffy44 I do not want to sound counter productive and discouraging to you. But I have a different opinion about your situation.

There are two reasons why we study more. One is we want to make a name for ourselves by becoming some expert in some field or some bigshot as an aspiration OR we want to earn more compensation. As a man, i did it to earn more.

And why do we want to earn more is because we have responsibilities, duties towards our current and future family, and our goals upto our retirement.

Your case is different. Believe me I envy your situation. You have opted not to marry of raise children. So, you are out of the biggest duty and responsibility of your life. Now, you are free and relaxed. The only goals for you are related to yourself and maybe your current family.

You are earning a decent salary for an old metro city. I am certain its a sustainable job where you can get periodic raises. So your salary will grow. Your expenses are low, your saving rate is high. If you continue this way, you maybe able to even FIRE by 45. Your parents are not totally dependent on you. You are staying with your family, taking care of each other, in your own country, you are spending money on gadgets once a year.

Why then would you want to leave a fulfilling life behind and go abroad to further study where you will be facing so many hardships and problems financially, physically, mentally, psychologically?

I know you might be thinking of others who are getting handsome packages and all. But its not always about how much more money you earn, it how much you are able to save and invest. After 40, all this earning and money starts to look lame and not meaningful for your personal self.

Think about what you have and what you actually want. Sometimes we are so blinded by our aspirations and ambitions, that we do not see what we are actually leaving behind.

We can check your FIRE status separately. But thats not important for you right now. So, think holistically and then make a decision. Its your life, only yours. Good luck for your future.

 

[mary07]

@imjapun

Believe me I envy your situation. You have opted not to marry of raise children. So, you are out of the biggest duty and responsibility of your life. Now, you are free and relaxed. The only goals for you are related to yourself and maybe your current family.

Are you saying being single is best life one can have ?

 

[imjapun]

@mary07 I am stating my own opinion based on my personal experience. I dont think I have adviced her to do that. She already has decided it. I wish I had her opportunity of making that choice once more.

 

[mary07]

@imjapun Fair enough ...can you shed some light on why you think marriage and raising kid is biggest responsibilities ...I understand raising kid is hard duty but what about marriage ? I am on fence right now regarding marriage and stuff. Thanks

 

[imjapun]

@mary07 Have you not being brought up in a family? Have you not seen your parents or any parents take all kinds of efforts for continuing their marriage and raising their kids?

May it be love or arranged marriage, maintaining a comittment is hard work. You both need to take efforts to keep love, trust and understanding in a marriage. Most often than not, a marriage could become an obligation. But if partners stick together, they can tide through thick and thin and still be together for all life.

Our parents have done that, our grandparents have done that. I mean...stick together.

Everyone's experience regarding marriage is different. That does not mean marriage is bad. Its just that it needs efforts and its a responsible relationship you cannot just break up at every disagreement and part ways, especially after having kids.

Lastly, just because I said I envy OP does not mean I am abandoning my marriage. I am doing what I am supposed to do. Yes, reddit is a place where I can freely express my desire though.

 

[tempfunny]

@mary07 Marriage in itself is a big responsibility. You are bringing in another family to take care of, not just your wife, both financially and emotionally.

 

[cantplayalick]

@duffy44 You're spending 60k on tech every year? It's totally cool if it's something you like, but if you're looking to cut on spending and investing more, you might want to relook at this expense (again, if you're an enthusiast, ignore this)

Like others have pointed out, cost of studying in the US increases every year so you might want to look at going now than wait for 3 more years.

 

[duffy44]

@cantplayalick Always wanted to buy cool tech gadgets as a kid. It's a phase I guess. But will control. Thanks!

 

[cantplayalick]

@duffy44 That's okay, part of the joy of being an adult is to get things you wanted as a kid.

So even as I have a saving middle-class mentality, a month ago I travelled to Japan and shopped as much as my heart desired, at the Pokemon center. ^_^

 

[duffy44]

@cantplayalick Username checks out! I shop for clothes once a year I do not drink, smoke or even have chai. So, cool tech really makes my hands itch. Also, PC building is an expensive hobby lmao

 

[cantplayalick]

@duffy44 PC building ok that is way too cool, please ignore my original comment and just keep doing what you're doing

 

[susejlx]

@duffy44 Why are you building PCs every year?

 

[duffy44]

@susejlx Have you seen the GPU prices? I can afford one component a year by a stretch

 

[susejlx]

@duffy44 Yeah, but I actually bought a few components over the last 2 years to build my new pc. It did not cost so much every year. GPU is one time purchase as well even if it is costly.

 

[caringhusband]

@duffy44 You can join fb groups and get very good deals on GPU prices

 

[mrdean36]

@duffy44 60k is too less for pc building. One custom keyboard can cost 1/3 of that lol.

 

[duffy44]

@mrdean36 That's the fun part about building PC as a hobby. There's something for everyone. If someone can manage expectations and wants from their PCs, they can probably build something good in budget and something that suits their needs. And like I mentioned in some other comment that GPU prices are crazy so have to wait it out for each desired component, check different websites and offline stores regularly to get the best deal. So yes, have to budget and build slowly. And honestly I am happy with that. Mujhey kaunsi jaldi hai waise bhi

 

[mrdean36]

@duffy44 True. Don’t gatekeep things which gets you all the joy and fun. Even I keep buying new microcontrollers while I can’t keep up doing stuff with it.

 

[mrdean36]

@duffy44 I am not qualified to give financial advice, but since you said GPU take a look at the GPU stock price, it should give you hints where to invest.

 

[docshay]

@duffy44 Side note. Not my place to say this. Butttt think about marriage or getting a partner.

Life gets pretty lonely when you are a single male/female in your 40s 50s 60s without any partner.

Don't fall for the trap of ppl on social media saying stuff like 'I don't need no man' and all the other bs

Just a suggestion.

Financial side you doing great.